nascar nice car joke
Not bad, although as someone who has played their fair share of soccer I think you might be underestimating the size of a school bus or overestimating the size of a soccer goal. Because everytime I do good I find away to wreck it before I finish! What do you need to be able to drive in the outback?You need to show koala-fications. "Marvelous! With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy's truck leaves him too. She replied, "I am a lesbian. 8. "Left turn professional". Nascar pit crews have one very solid benefit A good retirement plan. Hell Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck? Non-athletic-sport-centered-around-rednecks Why are fans from Finland critical to motor racing? Who can drive all their customers away and still make money? A Mechanic is standing outside the garage as Roger Penske is coming in to check out the new Taurus, and can't help but notice that Mr. Penske has a Dog under each arm. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback with us! That car salesman is a real car-deal-ologist. Q: Whats the hardest thing about trying to become the first woman to win the Daytona 500? Bobby says to Jeff, "You know, we really suck as racers but I bet we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico." READ ALSO: Finally! If a piano player is called a pianist, wouldnt a racecar driver be called a racist? ._1aTW4bdYQHgSZJe7BF2-XV{display:-ms-grid;display:grid;-ms-grid-columns:auto auto 42px;grid-template-columns:auto auto 42px;column-gap:12px}._3b9utyKN3e_kzVZ5ngPqAu,._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px}._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP:before{content:"";margin-right:4px;color:#46d160}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{display:inline-block;word-break:break-word}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-weight:500}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-weight:400;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin-top:13px;margin-bottom:2px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO ._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;margin-right:4px;margin-left:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y{border-radius:4px;box-sizing:border-box;height:21px;width:21px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(2),._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(3){margin-left:-9px} Here are the corniest dad jokes to celebrate. "Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be a accident, and it certainly would be no great loss!" How do Prius owners drive?One hand on the wheel, the other patting themselves on the back. NASCAR isnt always just about the race. How do drivers eat healthily? What should you double check when buying an electric car?That your driving license is current. That car salesman is a real car-deal-ologist.Its been a long time since someone gave me such a stress test! Jeff asked, "Aren't you going to have any?" "Mph.". They keep changing tracks. A: So They Can Both Watch The Race 26. Who is there? After they have everything ready, they decide to give the crowd a demonstration. Liberals who watch Rupal Drag Race cannot make fun of conservatives for liking Nascar. 28. What kind of car does Yoda drive?A Toyoda. Theyre both filled with white trash. If India ever hosted Nascar Why do rednecks like to do it doggie style? What is a cars preferred mobile phone brand?No-Kia. explained the man in black. When he comes to, he says, "Boys, you saved a Three Time Winston Cup Champion. How do you even fit one in there? Superman thinks "GEEZ,what the hell has gotten into Kyle" but he gets back up on the stool and starts drinking again when all of a sudden WHACK!! The police were called to a NASCAR event when belligerent fans became violent after being asked to remove the Confederate flags they had brought to the event. Ok": Employee Leaves Work During An Emergency Because Manager Wouldn't Approve His Overtime, Clueless Director Calls For A Meeting Over Mass Resignation After Company Cancels WFH, Employee Explains It In A Way He Would Understand, Storage Company Charges Client For Something That Never Existed, So She Pretends Like It Does And Now They Have To Find It, "False Frugalities": 45 Examples Of People Trying To Save But Actually Losing Money, Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" Kyle Busch and Jeff Gordon were driving around a small country town when Kyle accidentally hit and killed a goat. Have I given you the tour of my estate yet? Jeff Gordon is out taking a stroll in the snow. In a tomato race, one tomato driver said to his competitor, ketch-up! I think it's important to keep the races separate. would it be called Namascar? When a BMW owner learns to driveWhat kind of car do they switch to? Don't worry; the funny jokes about cars won't be targeting you or your driving skills *wink wink*. What happens to fans if they run behind a dragster? Wrong. Who is there? Did you hear? Whats the best pickup line?Probably Chevys. Knock, knock! [1]jokes4us auto racing jokes jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_9490_1_1').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_9490_1_1', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });[2]Yellowjokes nascar joke jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_9490_1_2').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_9490_1_2', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });[3]punstoppable NASCAR Puns jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_9490_1_3').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_9490_1_3', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], }); The Top 78 NASCAR Quotes You Should Know | Les Listes. What is a Tesla Model 3s favorite dance?The Electric Slide. ._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa{margin-top:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._3EpRuHW1VpLFcj-lugsvP_{color:inherit}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa svg._31U86fGhtxsxdGmOUf3KOM{color:inherit;fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._2mk9m3mkUAeEGtGQLNCVsJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} "Ever since my wife found them in my glove compartment." What has 10 letters and starts with G-A-S? ._3K2ydhts9_ES4s9UpcXqBi{display:block;padding:0 16px;width:100%} ", As soon as the vehicle rolled into the pitstop, the jack said? Whats the difference between politicians and nascar drivers? In a timid voice, he speaks: "If an airplane carrying Tony Stewart, Jimmie Johnson and Jeff Gordon crashed into a mountain, that would be a tragedy." Q: What Does NASCAR Stand For? Why did the owner name his vehicle 'Bad News'? Hey Pandas, Who Was Your Favorite Black History Month Icon You Learned About This BHM? /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/TopicLinksContainer.3b33fc17a17cec1345d4_.css.map*/Here I thought Jeremy Clarkson, being the asshole he is, would wholly jump on the bandwagon for shit-talking NASCAR. 60. New Teslas dont come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. A: Half the cars in Sundays Race. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. Whats the difference between a presidential election and a nascar race? ''WHO WON THE 1975 WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP?''. Just look at our cars. I wanted to buy a new electric car. What kind of vehicle does a chicken drive?A coop. 10. Cargo. This time, he comes back pretty messed up - he's got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious. Have you Heard? Web1. A: Hollywood is calling and wants him to co-star in a sequel to Speed Racer. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work. 9. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Brake-fast. What did the traffic light say to the car?Dont look, I am about to change. We need to stop mixing races. Cargo, who? Thats not a leakMy car just marking its territory. Q: What dont drivers eat before a big race? "Well, what are these perverts doing here by the road?" A Baguetti Veyron. It's lights out, and away they go! You each deserve a reward. A: Caution Flag Yellow, 57. Error occurred when generating embed. Whats the difference between NASCAR and the NBA? What is the least favourite meal for drivers? You can read more about it and change your preferences. Why did the electric car go to court?It was charged with battery. They wave the Finnish flag at the end of the Grand Prix. Iona. What type of car do sheep like to drive?A Lamborghini! Start writing! What is a lacrosse players favorite type of car? Q: What would Dale Earnhardt be doing if he was alive today? ": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics), "He's A Douchebag": 50 People Share What Schoolmates-Turned-Celebrities Were Like Before Fame, 30 Informative And Fun Food Charts For Anyone Trying To Eat Smarter, 30 Of The Most Spine-Chilling Things Kids Have Ever Said, As Shared In This Viral Twitter Thread, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", 50 Times People Had A Beautiful Tattoo Idea And It Got Executed Perfectly, Guy Puts In His "Notice Of Immediate Resignation" After Boss Disregards Their Verbal Agreement, Warns Others To Always Write Things Down, AITA? I just got nine out of 10 on my drivers test.The last guy was able to get out of the way. The image that comes to mind is probably that of a brutish, beer guzzling, loud mouth, hairy, unwashed, unshaven, redneck The concrete barrier is the hardest at the tracks you wreck at. ._38lwnrIpIyqxDfAF1iwhcV{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-lineColor);border:none;height:1px;margin:16px 0}._37coyt0h8ryIQubA7RHmUc{margin-top:12px;padding-top:12px}._2XJvPvYIEYtcS4ORsDXwa3,._2Vkdik1Q8k0lBEhhA_lRKE,.icon._2Vkdik1Q8k0lBEhhA_lRKE{border-radius:100%;box-sizing:border-box;-ms-flex:none;flex:none;margin-right:8px}._2Vkdik1Q8k0lBEhhA_lRKE,.icon._2Vkdik1Q8k0lBEhhA_lRKE{background-position:50%;background-repeat:no-repeat;background-size:100%;height:54px;width:54px;font-size:54px;line-height:54px}._2Vkdik1Q8k0lBEhhA_lRKE._1uo2TG25LvAJS3bl-u72J4,.icon._2Vkdik1Q8k0lBEhhA_lRKE._1uo2TG25LvAJS3bl-u72J4{filter:blur()}.eGjjbHtkgFc-SYka3LM3M,.icon.eGjjbHtkgFc-SYka3LM3M{border-radius:100%;box-sizing:border-box;-ms-flex:none;flex:none;margin-right:8px;background-position:50%;background-repeat:no-repeat;background-size:100%;height:36px;width:36px}.eGjjbHtkgFc-SYka3LM3M._1uo2TG25LvAJS3bl-u72J4,.icon.eGjjbHtkgFc-SYka3LM3M._1uo2TG25LvAJS3bl-u72J4{filter:blur()}._3nzVPnRRnrls4DOXO_I0fn{margin:auto 0 auto auto;padding-top:10px;vertical-align:middle}._3nzVPnRRnrls4DOXO_I0fn ._1LAmcxBaaqShJsi8RNT-Vp i{color:unset}._2bWoGvMqVhMWwhp4Pgt4LP{margin:16px 0;font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px}.icon.tWeTbHFf02PguTEonwJD0{margin-right:4px;vertical-align:top}._2AbGMsrZJPHrLm9e-oyW1E{width:180px;text-align:center}.icon._1cB7-TWJtfCxXAqqeyVb2q{cursor:pointer;margin-left:6px;height:14px;fill:#dadada;font-size:12px;vertical-align:middle}.hpxKmfWP2ZiwdKaWpefMn{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-active);background-size:cover;background-image:var(--newCommunityTheme-banner-backgroundImage);background-position-y:center;background-position-x:center;background-repeat:no-repeat;border-radius:3px 3px 0 0;height:34px;margin:-12px -12px 10px}._20Kb6TX_CdnePoT8iEsls6{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin-bottom:8px}._20Kb6TX_CdnePoT8iEsls6>*{display:inline-block;vertical-align:middle}.t9oUK2WY0d28lhLAh3N5q{margin-top:-23px}._2KqgQ5WzoQRJqjjoznu22o{display:inline-block;-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;position:relative}._2D7eYuDY6cYGtybECmsxvE{-ms-flex:1 1 auto;flex:1 1 auto;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis}._2D7eYuDY6cYGtybECmsxvE:hover{text-decoration:underline}._19bCWnxeTjqzBElWZfIlJb{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;display:inline-block}._2TC7AdkcuxFIFKRO_VWis8{margin-left:10px;margin-top:30px}._2TC7AdkcuxFIFKRO_VWis8._35WVFxUni5zeFkPk7O4iiB{margin-top:35px}._1LAmcxBaaqShJsi8RNT-Vp{padding:0 2px 0 4px;vertical-align:middle}._2BY2-wxSbNFYqAy98jWyTC{margin-top:10px}._3sGbDVmLJd_8OV8Kfl7dVv{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;margin-top:8px;word-wrap:break-word}._1qiHDKK74j6hUNxM0p9ZIp{margin-top:12px}.Jy6FIGP1NvWbVjQZN7FHA,._326PJFFRv8chYfOlaEYmGt,._1eMniuqQCoYf3kOpyx83Jj,._1cDoUuVvel5B1n5wa3K507{-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center;margin-top:12px;width:100%}._1eMniuqQCoYf3kOpyx83Jj{margin-bottom:8px}._2_w8DCFR-DCxgxlP1SGNq5{margin-right:4px;vertical-align:middle}._1aS-wQ7rpbcxKT0d5kjrbh{border-radius:4px;display:inline-block;padding:4px}._2cn386lOe1A_DTmBUA-qSM{border-top:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-lineColor);margin-top:10px}._2Zdkj7cQEO3zSGHGK2XnZv{display:inline-block}.wzFxUZxKK8HkWiEhs0tyE{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);cursor:pointer;text-align:left;margin-top:2px}._3R24jLERJTaoRbM_vYd9v0._3R24jLERJTaoRbM_vYd9v0._3R24jLERJTaoRbM_vYd9v0{display:none}.yobE-ux_T1smVDcFMMKFv{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px}._1vPW2g721nsu89X6ojahiX{margin-top:12px}._pTJqhLm_UAXS5SZtLPKd{text-transform:none}